dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
