I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
