I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Bang-toberfest begins!!
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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