i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
