READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize