all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Randomize
