Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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