she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
