look no pants
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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