i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
