You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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