Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Randomize
