I wanna bring you to show and tell
WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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