Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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