she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Also, beer. Big fan.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Randomize
