There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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