their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
