Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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