Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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