Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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