I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
