i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
