My pussy is not your playground.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
