Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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