Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
