You work out of a Hotel?
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
