i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
