Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I think a kid would responsible me up
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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