New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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