lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
