She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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