matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
