quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
It was confusing and full of hummus
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
