hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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