i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
