And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
