GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
