Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
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