brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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