Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
