I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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