I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
