Taylor Swift is so right about you.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
