what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
