Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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