i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
i barfeds in our rink
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
