i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Randomize
