wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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