I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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