This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
