I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
